Tales of the Shattered Moon: The Signed Novel
by Darthkvzn
Summary: In which we find out that Blake is a huge geek and Yang doesn't really get it. Mild sexual themes.


**With all the Volume 3 news, I couldn't resist. Here's a quick oneshot I wrote! - Darthkvzn**

* * *

Being in a relationship for almost four years, you're bound to discover a lot about your significant other. I'm pretty much an open book; Blake's never had to work too hard to figure me out, I don't think. My girlfriend, on the other hand, is about as closed off as they come. I knew that going in, though - we'd been teammates, and more importantly partners for three years by the time she agreed to go out with me. Still, eight years of knowing her, I thought I knew almost everything about her, and I was proud of it.

I never would've guessed what her hobby was, though.

Blake reads _a lot_. She eventually explained to me that the reason she enjoys it so much, is that it reminds her of the brief time in her life where her family was still happy and whole - her parents owned a bookstore, which was burned to the ground by anti-faunus extremists, with them inside. I respected her habit, even though the most reading I've ever done was when Mom died and Ruby didn't have anyone to tell her stories at night, with Dad so depressed.

As our relationship progressed and we eventually moved together, I found out that Blake was downright obsessed with this ongoing series of novels for teenagers which told the story of a young boy called Henry Toner, who'd grown up without realizing he had a powerful Semblance, since his parents had been killed by a Grimm worshipper when he was a baby, and he'd been left with his Semblance-hating family. I personally didn't see the appeal on the series - I mean, who'd be so stupid as to hate Semblances, right? But Blake thought it was the best book series in the world.

That's how I found myself fetching a latte for my drowsy girlfriend, who'd spent an entire night and half the morning waiting in line to get a signed copy of the last book in the series: Henry Toner and the Deathstalker's Bellows.

-"Hey, there beautiful. Here's your latte; no coffee, extra milk, just the way you like it!" -I said cheerfully.

Blake glared at me mildly (she wasn't big on public displays of affection), but took the cup gracefully. "Thank you."

I poked my head to either side, looking at the line outside the bookstore, currently hundreds strong. "Will this thing come out today, or was I actually right when I said you'd wait a week for it?" -I asked jokingly.

Blake sighed. "It should be half an hour more, plus however long it takes for the line to move on to me." -she said glumly. Then she perked up, her amber eyes shining. "But it'll be worth it!"

My eyebrow went up at her uncharacteristically peppy attitude, but decided my teasing case needed to be further built upon. "So, what's this book about, anyway?" -I asked innocently.

Her look was one of mild annoyance when she answered. "I've talked about this for the last six months; how haven't you learned every single thing I know yet?" -she asked dubiosly.

I shrugged; I didn't need to lie for this one. "I have zero patience and/or memory for angsty, teenaged characters."

-"You take that _back_ , Yang Xiao-Long." -she said, narrowing her eyes.

I raised my hands in surrender. "Alright, alright, don't get your panties in a twist. I won't talk smack about your angsty _boyfriend_ anymore." -I said, smirking.

Blake huffed indignantly, but eventually slumped and sighed. "He's not my boyfriend, sadly. He's taken." -she said.

I crossed my arms, allowing a bit of my Aura to seep into my crimson-turned irises. "So, you'd like to be his boyfriend, eh?" -I asked dangerously.

-"He's a fictional character, Yang. I don't think your womanhood should feel threatened." -she deadpanned.

-"So...yes, then."

Blake sighed. "Yeah. He's _so_ going to get together with Minnie Mistly, though. They're _perfect_ together." -she said glumly.

Before I could tease her further, the fan in front of us (a tiny, bunny eared faunus with gray hair) turned back, absolutely red-faced in anger. "Henry is NEVER going to stay with Mistly. Haven't you read the books at all? Dust, he's obviously going to end up with Krayko Harcoy - G. H. Scowling has been setting up their sexual tension for six books, after all." -she said smugly.

My girlfriend's cat ears turned backwards aggressively. "Henry isn't gay! Where the heck do you get that from? Scowling herself has denied any homosexuality between those two!" -she said.

I had a pretty decent 'What The Dust' face on, looking between the two women whose situation looked to be rapidly devolving into a cat fight (heh), when we were all interrupted by Blake's scroll and mine. Since I saw her fish it out before I did, I waited for her to tell me what it was about, but I got worried when her already pale complexion turned the color of Grimm bone plates.

-"What's wrong? Weiss and Ruby got in trouble again?" -I asked, frowning.

She barely shook her head, growing even paler. "I...this can't…" -she said, then turned to me, a grim (heh) expression on her face. "We...have a mission."

I was just about to happily bust out Ember Celica, when I remembered where we were, and, more importantly, _why_ we were there. "Oh...Blake, I'm so sorry. I mean, if you want, I can go by myself. I'm sure I can handle it." -I said.

Blake looked half-tempted to accept my offer, but shook her head. "Ozpin himself asked for us. We have to go." -she said, and I swear I could hear her heart breaking without any fancy Faunus hearing.

-"Damn...maybe there'll be some copies left?" -I said optimistically.

She shook her head. "There'll barely be enough for this line at best. Let's just go." -she said, grabbing her things and resolutely walking away from the line, even when the bunny girl snickered at her predicament. I scowled, then took the plush she was holding (a white Nevermore?), kicking it into orbit and sticking my tongue out, following Blake afterwards.

* * *

The mission was a resounding success, with Blake giving such a great performance against the onslaught of Grimm that her Aura never even got touched. Instead of celebrating though, I was left scowling at the sound of my girlfriend crying herself to sleep beside me.

-"This is unhealthy." -I said flatly.

Blake didn't answer, still crying into her pillow.

I huffed, then spent the next half an hour or so doing everything from a light poke to her ribs, to baring my chest to her, in an effort to get her out of her funk. Sadly, it didn't work.

-"Ok, that's it. I can't take this anymore. Put on some pants, we're going out." -I said, tossing her some clothes.

A few minutes later, I parked Bumblebee outside of Junior's, and forced Blake to move from her near-catatonic state. I grabbed her by the shoulders, and looked directly into her red-rimmed, glassy, golden eyes. "You and I are going to go inside, drink until we pass out, and get at least _some_ of that sadness out of you, because I love you, and I can't see, hear, or do you like this." -I said sternly.

She sniffled, but nodded meekly, and we went in.

It took half an hour for her to even touch her drink, but once she did, she didn't stop for the rest of the night.

-"What's with your girl?" -asked Junior, as he served her for the seventh time that night.

-"She missed getting the last Henry Toner book signed because of work. Honestly, I couldn't have imagined a book could do this to a person." -I said, at a loss.

Junior winced. "Damn...that's rough. Tell you what, Blondie, her drinks are on the house tonight. I know I was that way when I couldn't get the fifth book, myself." -he said, understandingly.

I pulled another W.T.D. face, then decided some things were better left a mystery.

* * *

I woke up at my couch, reeking of alcohol, yet thankfully unaffected by the hangover. Blake wasn't in the room, but in the bed, her eyes puffy, but her face blissfully calm with sleep. Naturally, I pulled her feet to wake her up, getting me a near instantaneous pillow to the face.

-"Ugh. We stink." -she said, covering her hypersensitive nose.

-"Yup. What do you say we get rid of the stench with a nice shower, beautiful?" -I asked suggestively.

She pursed her lips, as if in thought, then rolled her eyes. "Fine. But I'm only doing it because you're such a great girlfriend for getting me drunk last night. I needed it." -she said, then walked into the bathroom, swaying her hips.

I followed her in. An outside viewer would've seen the closed door of our bathroom and heard. 'So, what's that about the girl-on-girl fanfiction you wrote?', asked by me, followed by a swift slip and fall from my darling, well balanced girlfriend.

I got her a signed copy of the book as an apology, later that year.

* * *

 **I do not endorse drinking oneself to unconsciousness! Hope you enjoyed, and I'll see you next time! - Darthkvzn**


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